Trust

I've had trust issues ever since I was 12 years old.  I have yet to have anyone prove me wrong as to why I shouldn't trust.  I know that hinders me in life and in finding true happiness, but I'd much rather be alone and at peace with myself, than drag myself through drama because someone else has once again validated my belief.  I'm still doing good, still making progress, still getting stronger every day.  I'm still working on me, and I'm still keeping a positive attitude on life.  But today I ask, why trust anyone?  Even those who say love you, still hurt you, break promises, lie, etc.  I'm no one to judge, so I will try not to.  I'm tired of lies, I'm tired of being disappointed time and time again.  I'm tired of feeling guilty when I have to draw a line.  I need to remember that I have to love myself, because no one else will.  Yes, people love me in their own way, but I need to love me and always remember to do that.  I need to treat myself kind.  I need to know what's good for me and what's not, and walk away from what's not good for me.  Too many times I've made excuses for others when they treat me poorly; I allow them to mistreat me.  Starting today, no more.  This pertains to my closest and dearest too.  I will no longer be manipulated; I will no longer allow others to have power over my feelings; I'm in control now.  If someone is treating me poorly, I will recognize it, and I will stop it from happening.  I'm done with being second best.  I've always wondered why I get scraps from others, and I know it's because I let it happen.